We’re Pregnant.

26 Mar

So there are some things that you should know:

The missionary that trains you is called your father. And you are his son. Your second companion in the field is your step-father. The missionary who takes you contacting your first day before you get a companion is your mother. So we all have parents in the mission. Sorry Mom and Dad.

Extract from the Book of Marquez:

1 And we, being a good and wholesome people, followed the traditions of our fathers.

2 And it came to pass that here in Mantes, being in a trio (that is to say departing from the normal companionship and working as three), we pondered over the changes that would be made to our area. For never had it been seen of a trio to last more than one transfer.

3 And this was the way of our thought.

4 And behold, Elder Sorensen did cry out with a loud voice and declared, Surely it is I who shall leave, for I have been here longest! And it seems to me that you, Elder Marquez and Elder Nielson, shall continue to work for the Lord here in Mantes.

5 But I, Elder Marquez, being much wiser, smarter and all around better, did say unto him: You cannot possibly know the way of our mission president, nay even God who is your Father. For behold, I have a tinkling in my toes that thou shalt stay yet another here in Mantes.

6 And the week past and it became Friday.

7 Now, the tradition of our mission was that the Assistants and President should call all the new district leaders, zone leaders and trainers throughout the land. And this I knew, and my companions did know it too.

8 And it came to pass that while we knocked doors, our portable telephone device did cry from Elder Soreneon’s pocket. And behold he did answer and I did learn that it was my step-father on the other end of the phone, that is to say Elder Nelson, who was one of the two Assitants to the President.

9 And behold, we did listen intently, for Elder Nelson did speak many strange things unto us, insomuch that we did wonder in stupor.

10 And these were his words: Ok, I need to talk to Elder Sorenson and Elder Marquez. Alright, we have a special situation for you two. You will both be staying in Mantes as a trio. However, your new companion will be a new missionary, so you’ll both be trainers. He is visa waiting to start his mission in the States–he’s French and he’s from Bordeaux. He hasn’t even entered the MTC yet so he’ll be with you two for five weeks and then he’ll go to the States to go to the MTC. And he’s the son of one of President Poznanski’s good friends so don’t mess up!

11 And it was so.

12 And we did find this strange, for we knew that this was a strange thing to be had. For this missionary would have two fathers. And behold, normal this is not.

13 And it came to pass that Saturday came and we learned that our companion, Elder Nielson, would be sent to Saint-Quentin. And we did weep with him.

14 I write these things on a Monday, and so we have not yet met this new companion. And thus we shall continue to mourn for Elder Nielson and eat many burritos in his honour.

15 And, indeed, I write these things that ye may know that we are pregnant.
Elder Saul Marquez

Wish us luck!

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Posted by on March 26, 2012 in Mission


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